Maggomaly Mouse
Since all the flooding we've had a minor mouse problem. By that I mean one rainy morning Matt and I were sitting at the kitchen table over a cup of coffee, and Matt coolly inquires, "Is that a mouse on the counter by the sink?" So I look over. "Yep. Most definitely a mouse." We turn away and continue sipping our coffee and discussing our plans for the day. No, kidding, we actually bickered because it was MY book he picked up to smash it's skull with and I most definitely object to mouse-blood on my books. In the meantime the little bugger scampered off to safety. That afternoon Matt launched his attack, and the next morning we had mousage (portmanteau--> mouse + sausage) with our eggs and oatmeal.
The landlord in the meantime purchased several expensive noise-emitters that are supposed to keep away mice, spiders, and things like that. Okey-dokey. We plugged those suckers in, and haven't had any problems since. Until it rained wayyy heavy yesterday. Now all of a sudden the "fixed" roof is leaking again, and one of the "leftover" mousetraps we never deactivated had a dead mouser in it. This occured between the hours of 9am and 10am this morning while I was cleaning. I SWEAR it wasn't there at 9am when I was cleaning up around the apartment, but it was most DEFINITELY there at 10am when I went to vaccumm.
And this brings me to my Maggomaly (portmanteau--> Maggie + Anomaly). I not just move, but touch, clean and do all sorts of things for dead HUMAN bodies at work all the time... but I absolutely could NOT bring myself to dispose of this piddly ol' dead mouser. I didn't even have to TOUCH it, and I couldn't do it. Like, we're talking total hysterical breakdown just crying about this stupid mouse, all the while inwardly scoffing at myself with embarrassment. I even went so far as to humiliate myself by paying my sister Becca $80 to come remove it, which she did. Okay, fine, I OWED her the $80 to begin with, but still. It was pretty shameful that I got her to drive over to do this simple task for me. Especially seeing as how I'm the girl who kept mice around to feed to her snake on a regular basis! Grab the sucker by the tail and throw him in to be destroyed! I'd also watch with fascination as my constrictor snake sssssttreeetcccchhhheeedddd out their little bodies and wiggled it's neck as it swallowed them to audibly crush all their bones and aid digestion. I still think that's pretty nifty about constrictors and have no problem watching it. So what is my hang up with this darn mouse?? I feel so lame. THIS SHOULD BE NOTHING FOR ME.
And I just couldn't do it. Man. What a Maggomaly.
The landlord in the meantime purchased several expensive noise-emitters that are supposed to keep away mice, spiders, and things like that. Okey-dokey. We plugged those suckers in, and haven't had any problems since. Until it rained wayyy heavy yesterday. Now all of a sudden the "fixed" roof is leaking again, and one of the "leftover" mousetraps we never deactivated had a dead mouser in it. This occured between the hours of 9am and 10am this morning while I was cleaning. I SWEAR it wasn't there at 9am when I was cleaning up around the apartment, but it was most DEFINITELY there at 10am when I went to vaccumm.
And this brings me to my Maggomaly (portmanteau--> Maggie + Anomaly). I not just move, but touch, clean and do all sorts of things for dead HUMAN bodies at work all the time... but I absolutely could NOT bring myself to dispose of this piddly ol' dead mouser. I didn't even have to TOUCH it, and I couldn't do it. Like, we're talking total hysterical breakdown just crying about this stupid mouse, all the while inwardly scoffing at myself with embarrassment. I even went so far as to humiliate myself by paying my sister Becca $80 to come remove it, which she did. Okay, fine, I OWED her the $80 to begin with, but still. It was pretty shameful that I got her to drive over to do this simple task for me. Especially seeing as how I'm the girl who kept mice around to feed to her snake on a regular basis! Grab the sucker by the tail and throw him in to be destroyed! I'd also watch with fascination as my constrictor snake sssssttreeetcccchhhheeedddd out their little bodies and wiggled it's neck as it swallowed them to audibly crush all their bones and aid digestion. I still think that's pretty nifty about constrictors and have no problem watching it. So what is my hang up with this darn mouse?? I feel so lame. THIS SHOULD BE NOTHING FOR ME.
And I just couldn't do it. Man. What a Maggomaly.
Labels: Death, this is all wrong
posted by mags at 11:23 AM
4 Comments:
Love the use of portmanteau.
Yeah, you would. It's sickening the lows I hafta stoop to just to get you to read my **** posts.
You're gettin' predictable, KP.
Don't feel bad that you couldn't face mouse-disposal on your own. I made one of our (also female) houseguests kill and dispose of the BIGGEST most DISGUSTING spider EVER yesterday. I just couldn't. Seriously, that thing was the size of a sea-crab. Looked like it just scuttled in off the beach.
Oh, I totally feel you on this one Maggie. A couple years ago we had the most obnoxious, invincible mouse that would flaunt himself in broad daylight and I literally couldn't sleep until he was destroyed. I couldn't understand why RObbie wouldn't drive home to catch him when I spotted him in the middle of the day - to me it was a major home crisis!!
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