Bright Idea

Tonight at work they had to turn off the electricty and switch to generator power... which only is supposed to have enough power to vaguely illuminate the halls. Seeing as how I work 3rd shift this meant that we'd be doing cares for people in their rooms in pitch black by flashlights. This also meant that people who have those pressurized air mattresses (to help prevent bedsores), NG feeding tubes, or oxygen tanks needed alternative source of energy.

So we went around hooking all that crap up, extension cords criss crossing halls everywhere, filling portable oxygen tanks, and what have you. And then we had to do something about the call lights so residents can get a hold of us if they need something. Our solution? Noisemakers. You know, like for new years or birthday parties. Speaking of which, I want those at my next birthday party. But right, so I have to go around waking people up, explaining to them their purpose, and giving to them. Of course this is a ridiculous idea because none of these oldies have the lung capacity to go crazy on a noisemaker (least of all those on oxygen tanks!!). In fact, the most I got out of them was the feeblest of toots that could hardly be heard from 5 feet away. It was pretty pathetic. And it got most of them all anxious and stressed out-- they could die and no one would know. But right, we "covered our asses," I guess. Or something.

And then after spending an hour getting this all worked out, the call lights ended up being powered by the emergency generators after all. Which meant that EVERY FREAKING resident we'd woken up had their call light on when the lights went out because they were scared and needed to be reassured they'd be taken care of-- and also just to see if they'd work. But I mean... any one of those lights could have been the real deal, "I've fallen and I can't get up!" or needing to be toileted, or what have you. So I had to answer every freaking one and spend FOREVER on each of them reassuring them everything was going to be okay. Sigh. Had we not bothered with that bogus crap and woken them all up they'd all have slept right through it!

Whatta joke.