Creepy or Kind?

So as anyone who read the last post may have gathered, I'm functionally moved into my new apartment (though I've by no means completed the process). I'd been sleeping on the sofa, but yesterday I got a (sweet deal on a!!)mattress and so I slept in my new, great bargain, queen-sized bed for the first time. It was huge and kinda scary, actually. I'm so used to twin beds pushed lengthwise against walls, not spacious, open to the room queenies... I felt so vulnerable.

And then at 2:30am I got a call from my landlord. He has security cameras set up on the parking lot that you can check online (www.fubars.net) and had noticed that I had left the dome-light on in my car... for hours. So he was calling me so my battery wouldn't be dead when I got up in the morning to drive to my exam. Pretty dang nice of him, really. Though a little weird... because he clearly seemed uncomfortable, either with calling me that late or admitting he was watching the camera like that. Don't get me wrong, I was INCREDIBLY grateful for the call... it just made me uncomfortable that he was uncomfortable. No harm no foul right? (Did I use that expression right?) But whatever-- pretty dang nice of him!

Then this afternoon while I was at school they moved in a new stove. When I first came they had a small-sized stove, and small-sized fridge. In our 2+ hour conversation when I was first checking the place out I had mentioned to him and his wife that I wanted to get into bread baking. So in the meantime they decided I needed a stove without a pilot light (particularly one that goes out a lot, whatever that means), and a full-size one at that. Which is incredibly nice of them seeing as how I don't have any idea how pilot lights work. Certainly not anything I ever would have expected or even regretted not having, but am very happy about. So he told me they were doing this and he was going to sell the old one on craigslist and it would be all happening on Friday (today) a while ago, but then when he called later to confirm he mentions he decided to get us a new fridge too. Which again-- I'm not complaining about. While they are larger, I suspect that the older ones we had were not particularly energy efficient to begin with. Pretty cool deal.

So they moved everything in, and when I came home I had a brand spanking new fridge and stove. Woo hoo! What's more, I noticed he set the clock for me. And he had brought down a table/chairs (pretty nice ones, too) from the attic, and assembled it for me to use. And when I moved it slightly to accomodate a wooden microwave cart, I noticed he had also cut out a number of little squares of cardboard under one of the feet of the table to perfectly balance the table for me. And then I went into the other room. I had gotten two standing lamps at Target the other day (woohoo! 2 for $15!) because there aren't any overheads other than in the bathroom and kitchen. I had assembled one of them- but I'd done it wrong because I hadn't bothered with the directions and hadn't had the time to fix it. Well he fixed it. AND assembled the other one, AND arranged them tastefully in different areas of the living area to maximize lighting. Clearly well thought out, because he didn't even leave the one I had in its original spot. Oh, and all the garbage from these and the plastic garbage from my bedding? He took all that out for me. Basically he came in like an elf in a workshop and totally made things nicer for me-- it was delightful discovering it all. Oh, and he indisputably vaccuumed, as well.

But.-- I hate saying "but" there.-- But I'm fretting about it. Maybe he's throw-back to the good old days when people did nice things for each other. I'm very hopeful that he is: I never got any creepy vibes in person with him. But then again, in the world I've come to know such behaviors from a man towards a female living someplace alone are highly suspect and creepy at best. And I HATE that about myself. Why the heck am I being paranoid and unsettled about this? Why are red flags going off because my landlord was thoughtful and attentive? Is it just because I'm alone here and there have been some other sketch things so far? (Not with him, though.) I don't know. My voice of reason is helplessly putting up its hands and shrugging.

I'm a terrible person for doubting his kindness at face value. That's no way to live your life. Then again-- how stupid would I be if I ignored my instinctual concern and it served to be right?

Then again? Pssh. I'm just being a loony. If Matt was here and Phil was around, I know it wouldn't phase me at all. I'd just be raving about how sweet my landlord is. So yeah. I'll just lay low until I'm not a free radical anymore.

In the meantime, however. I've had priests strongly recommend, even insist (that one was Fr. Michael...hehe... who'd have guessed?) that I obtain some sort of weapon if I was going to live by myself or without any related males around. Granted, I didn't take his advice because I simply couldn't see myself resolving a conflict in that way... but lately I'm wondering if I'd have a lot more peace of mind if I did. When push comes to shove, you'll resolve a conflict however you need to (within moral boundaries). And no, Phil, I'm not talking about guns here even though Fr. Michael was. Hmmm. Maybe I don't really know what I AM talking about either, though... I can't decide. But yeah. Whatcha guys think about such things? I have to be honest, this neighborhood is not quite as safe as I thought it was. Between the empty hard-alcohol bottles deposited practically on my doorstep, the drunk young punk hooligans hollering and stuff in the street after dark, the police raid on my immediate next door neighbors involving shutting down the whole street for a couple blocks, and the cops "hiding" parked in junker cars I've been noticing lately, "peace of mind" is not exactly a given at the moment. It's fine during the day, it's just once dark hits that it becomes an issue really. Anyway. It's just been on my mind.